Single After 30 Ain't Pretty!

There is a reason I wanted to get married in my twenties.

It's probably the only time you are clueless enough to jump into the huge pond of love, men and maybe even marriage. If you don't do it when you are young, when are you really going to do it? After you've lived your life long enough to know who you truly are? Oh yeh - right! So you know who you are, what you like, what you don't like - and you are going to just open the door for any person to walk right on it, change it all up and make compromises around it? Hmmm...

If you are past the stage of if it walks, talks, has a package, smells and looks good then it's yours - then there is no way you are going to fall in love with just anything. Then you get to the bigger things in life like what type of career he has, if he's good with children or will massage your feet at the end of the day. Even if he does all that, will you ever really be satisfied? No - because he will still have some major imperfections. So the catch 22 is that you gotta be in love to be blind to all of this walking love tank's imperfections and so when do you make that choice to take the plunge, to fall in love? Before or after you've examined his bank statement and checked his criminal record?

Marriages that last 50 years don't get there from starting in their 40's or without alot of young, blind and stupid love. We can all think that we can use these dating services and find who we will have chemistry, passion, romance, great sex, AND compatibility with, but I'm not buying it. At 31 when I get on these sites I see mostly totally clueless people with bad pictures, wordage and ideas about love and what they "expect" in a partner. I find myself at 31 with a couple of grey hairs, kids and I'm sure the wrong attitude!

After all that I have learned about love, marriage and relationships at this age, would I really put myself back out there to "start over" again to come back to these same thoughts again? I doubt it. If I'm lucky, I may find a great tennis partner who isn't too bad in bed either. Doesn't just the sound of that sound cold, lonely and shallow? I'm know it does, but the alternative takes a lot of sacrifice, hard work and even sometimes pain. It's definitely not for the weak of heart or late in age. And even though I'm still only 31, I've learned enough about myself to know and be okay with the fact that I'm a lazy bitch :)

At the end of the day you just gotta weigh the cost of marriage and/or a relationship and the cost of your freedom and figure out which is greater to you. We'd all love to live in the dillusional world of thinking that we can have our cake and eat it too, but life really doesn't work that way.