iPhone iNdiscretions

I am writing this blog while listening to Pandora Radio. But not just any old Pandora, Pandora on my brand-spanking new iPhone. I keep glancing over at it, just sitting there, playing music and looking fancy in its gold case. And while I love it and am having a darn good time dinging around in the App Store, I have to own up to being slightly scared of its power. I am terrified to become that girl on her iPhone - eschewing real life, real conversations, and real experiences for the abyss of technological wonder.

My husband gave me the iPhone for Christmas because I've had serious phone envy since he got his last fall. I saw him finding movie times, buying music and sawing zombies (Zombie Saw is real and available. It's apparently quite popular in Germany. And in the unlikely case of a Zombie invasion, you'd be ready) on the go and it all felt important. I couldn't help but see how much easier my life would be if I could Tweet on the fly, see who was friending who on Facebook, and just look stuff up like a madwoman. Online everywhere, it's an intoxicating idea, and I'm sort of anticipating a hangover.

The phone I gave up was just a phone. It was small and generic, whatever was free with my contract. It had a camera, but only because you literally cannot find a phone without one anymore. I tried. Because my healthy fear of invasive technology is not newfound. When cell phones began to blow up (yes I remember the time before them vividly) and they were improving at an exponential rate, I resisted. I didn't want it to flip open, or slide, or take pictures or video because it was a phone. Just a phone. And then texting. Oh, texting. I thought that was about the dumbest thing ever. Did we all really need to be instantly and constantly available to everyone? Then I thought these things about MySpace, Facebook and Twitter. Now look at me, fancy iPhone on which I text, take pictures, update my Facebook page and Tweet. Happily.

This is where I'm torn. It is fabulous and I love it. I want to be in tune with emerging technology. I don't want to dismiss what the "kids" are into or throw my hands up and claim not to get it. Really, I want to stay up on what's what. But am I still leery? Absolutely. I see people at dinner together and one or both are on their smartphone. I see groups of friends out and invariably several of them are elsewhere through the small glowing portal of their phone. We've all been on the other side of that, where the person we're with is somewhere else. It blows. The evils of "online everywhere" include interpersonal ADD. And that just means that a lot of us are guilty of being bad friends and bad spouses with really bad manners when we attend to that buzzing and dinging in our purses. Does that make me sound like the lady leaning out the window, angrily shaking my rolling pin? Probably.

It's not that simple I realize. The technology in our phones has both freed us and tied us down, allowed us to connect in really imaginative ways while simultaneously disconnecting us from the moment. And in turn it's all good and all bad. So while I tremble a bit in its presence, I certainly want to be along for the ride. Maybe the iPhone - still pretty and fancy and playing me nice music - is the angel and the devil on my shoulder. White wings when it knows that when I typed p;wxe that I totally mean place and when I can summon my Aunt's address while in line at the post office. And horns when I let work or Twitter invade a perfectly nice conversation or create a serious traffic jam at Whole Foods (um narrow enough aisles?) because I've stopped to look up a recipe. I'll have to make peace with my new toy - and all its powers - because I can't go back. But I will certainly make every attempt to harness it for good and show it who's boss. When I plug it in it does say "Molly's iPhone" which indicates that I'm in charge right? Humor me.