Love That is Always Remembered

Every one of my exes is an ex for a good reason.  Whether we out grew each other or were just plain sick of the rollercoaster ups and downs we managed to go our own ways with decency.  Except for one who is still trying to worm his way back into my life—but that’s another blog for another day.

Today I choose to only remember my former flames with positivity.  Each one of them imparted something substantial on my life and I can say that in many ways I am better because of them.  In high school when it came time for my boyfriend to go off to college he told me, “Never date someone who wants you to ditch school to hang out with him.  That kind of guy is selfish and doesn’t care about your future.”  That advice stayed with me all the way through school and even translated into my adult relationships. 

I’ve had a couple of exes who had such amazing work ethics that they extended the theory of what I already knew from my high school ex and showed me the benefits of working hard in pursuit of my dreams.    

In their own way they each helped me to develop lifetime habits and ways of thinking that continue to resonate with me today.

 “Always take your vitamins, you’ll want to have kids someday; you want to be healthy so you’ll have a good pregnancy.”

“Eat your vegetables so you won’t look old before your time.”

“Exercise will help boost your energy so that you can conquer the day.”

Their influence and guidance was not always in what they said, many times it was in the things that they did and came as a result of how they treated me. 

I’ve have exes who raised my expectations so high because they loved and cared for me so well that they made me realize what good relationships are really made of.  It’s hard to go back to bullsh*t when you’re accustomed to being treated like royalty.  That realization was a gift in itself.         

Even though we’ve gone our separate ways I still feel their encouragement nudging me forward and, in some situations, if needed I can still access their emotional support. 

I remember the time I was so stressed out from job searching; I went by an ex’s house to print some resumes.  I must have looked dejected because as I stood from his desk to get ready to leave he took both of my hands in his, looked at my face and said, “You know things are not always going to be this hard.  No matter what I’ve done over the years God has never left me and He’s not going to leave you either.”  He held me in a huge bear hug and started to pray for me aloud and began to rock me as I wept.  For weeks I had been crying alone trying to figure out what to do.  What he did for me that day touched my spirit in a way that was sincerely needed.               

For the most part my exes were good guys, some of them great guys—absolutely perfect, for someone else.  They inspired me to want better things for myself, be better than average, and most of all to encourage and do good unto others—a concept of love that is always remembered.