Catching the Holy Ghost

Some of you know my daughter so this blog will not come as a surprise at all.

To give you a little background – my child is a drama queen, with a very low tolerance for pain. She inherited both of these traits honestly - the drama through her mama and the low pain threshold through her daddy.

I can still cry at the drop of a dime just for the hell of it and my husband still has not finished all his dental work because he does not like (i.e. scared of) needles.

But our child…. she takes it to whole new levels. Awards should be given we she gets on a roll. For instance – this Easter both she and her cousin got splinters in their fingers. The cousin sat there as her father remove the splinter ... more fascinated by the process than anything else.

Not , my child … It took two adult women and a strong uncle to get it out her finger and she screamed like we were beating her.

Last week my child pinched her finger in the door – You know how you see something coming but just can’t get the warning out quick enough – this was such an occasion. Before the blister even appears my child is screaming for a Band-aid.

Side note – Band-Aids cure everything in our household - remember on “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” – where the father put Windex on everything – same concept.

My aunt who was visiting from out of town – has never seen my child's one person show – so she was very concerned. She runs upstairs desperately looking for a Band-Aid.

My father does not even look up

"The girl has a band-aid fetish – trust me she’s okay – I think we are out of Sponge Bob but there should be a Disney Princess in the cabinet.”

Meanwhile the blister has appeared – I am trying to get my child to stop crying . She really is a great actress – if I did not know better it would break my heart.

"Honey – it’s not bleeding – it a not a cut , it’s a blister.”

Now somewhere over the crying and screaming – my daughter must of heard “splinter” because she “Catches the Holy Ghost” .

Catching the Holy Ghost – in mostly black churches there is always this one old lady that rises her hands to the lord and falls out on the floor. The spirit has moved her to testify in front of the entire church about how the lord has helped her. So the pastor must stop his sermon and listen to her testify. While the rest of us response “Amen”. The whole thing is very entertaining – especially when it is the same lady each week.

Anyway – my child throws her hands in the air and lands on the floor – She is on her knees with her arms flat in front of her – as if in a yoga position . Tears are streaming down her face, her chest is heaving …she is crying so hard.

"No splinter, No Splinter “ -My mother and I just look at her and desperately try to keep a straight face.

"Honey – I did not say SPLINTER – I said a BLISTER" – I scream over the crying

My child who is laid out on the floor crying– stops mid cry – it is as if the director has said - "cut"

And ask - "What’s a blister?”

At this point my mom and I –start to cry ourselves because we are laughing so hard.

And my lovely aunt – who looks like she is ready to call 911 – has located the band-aid.

She seemed very confused that the crisis was over.