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Staci Backauskas

When I couldn’t find a job after getting my journalism degree, I went back to school and got an EMT license – a pivotal choice that created the set point for my life. I caught a lot of flack for putting the employment search on hold. Some said I was impatient; others accused me of being too ar...

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No Sympathy for Silver

by Staci B

I haven’t watched a lot of the Olympics this year, but what I’ve seen has given me a glimpse of a disturbing trend: the belief that joy can only be experienced when you get the gold.  Not only is this evident in Beijing, it’s a movement that has been spreading through American culture like a Trojan virus.

The dejected looks on the faces of US gymnasts, runners and swimmers as they waited to be presented with their silver medals defines the perception clearly: the only satisfaction worth having comes with the gold.  This totally discounts everything that these athletes learned and the magnificent gifts each received on the long road to Beijing.

This gold-standard value has infiltrated every area of American thinking.  We begin prepping our kids at the age of four to ready them for the absurd competition that now exists for admission to a good college.  Young people are deluged with the importance of being the thinnest,  prettiest, strongest, and smartest.  Those that don’t win “first place” risk drowning in the perception that they aren’t good enough.

The truth is that not everyone has the desire to be a super model, the drive to be Charles Atlas, the interest in getting a four-year degree or the intelligence to be Einstein.  That doesn’t make anyone less than – it just makes him or her different. 

Another impact of this pervasive thought system is that it doesn’t allow any of us to live in the moment.  When you’re always preparing for the future, you can’t help but to get attached to the outcome of your labor, whether it’s Olympic-level athletic training or working for that promotion. 

Living like this makes disappointment inevitable because in your mind you’ve already dictated the only acceptable result.  Focusing on the future feeds your ego as well, which means that even if you do get that gold, you’ll find some flaw in the journey that got you there.  The peace and self-esteem that was the goal beneath the goal will still elude you.

Yes, competition has been around since the first amoeba split, but the level to which it’s been raised is insane.  When world-class athletes wear the mask of dejection on the medal platform because they only won silver at the OLYMPICS – a competition among the best of the best – it just reinforces that if you don’t claim the top prize, the journey wasn’t worth it.