blog entry

The Beatch Is Back

howdy, y'all!

Can you tell I've been to the South Carolina coast? I'm throwin' howdy, y'all, and BBQ like nobody's business! Miss me much? Sorry for the absence, but it was MUCH needed, you know what I mean? I'm sure I can't be the only one that gets tired of the "everydayness" of life, right? It was lovely to pay lots of money to sleep in someone else's really clean place near really wet water and really sandy sand, that was REALLY freakin' clean.... did I say that already? The experience made me realize that we have WAY too much stuff. Stuff that moves, stuff that doesn't, stuff that matters and stuff that never will. I am renting a big dumpster (told you I was gonna do it) on Friday and tossing anything that doesn't run away from me. Let's hope Dora doesn't fall asleep in the process... I learned a few things about myself while we were away, which is NORMALLY not a good thing, but this actually was. It seems that I have a bit of an obsessive personality. While I wish it affected my housecleaning skills, it sadly does not. It DOES, however, have everything to do with the time I spend with my eyeballs glued to the computer screen. I feel that I am quite possibly dealing with some confidence issues, mostly in regards to what I write, and the question I keep asking myself that goes something like, "Why do you even do this? Are you really any good at all?"I know that you all will be amazed to know I've never published anything, no books, no essays, no recipes, nada. I have every DESIRE to do so, just don't know how.... my brain doesn't naturally see the path in the woods that leads to printed pages with my name at the bottom. As far as my blogging obsession goes, I tend to stalk the screen, hoping for comments, checking the clicker thingy ma bob just in case someone has chosen to grace me with a word of whatever. What I realized this week, though, was that my spawn tend to be neglected a tad in that quest for assurance. In truth, I am everything they need, even when I'm NOT writing a perfect paragraph that makes me (or you all) laugh. Don't get me wrong, I'm not quitting. Not even close. I'm just going to cut down a bit. Give myself a schedule, then stick to it. Give THEM the majority of my time, of my brain, of me the mommy. THE GARDEN REPORT Gardening is up and running again, though we are "mixing it up" a bit, as the nasty neighbor is in town. We had a fantastic time together at the beach, though we did a lot of NOTHING and loved every second. Leo got up with the kids every day, without being asked, AND made coffee. That was the sexiest thing he could've possibly done and needless to say, it worked in BOTH our favors. Word of advice, if you're gardening at the beach, clean all sand out of cracky parts before putting your shovel in the dirt. That's all I have to say about that.