Believing in Michele

I believe in believing in people’s dreams. When we were in high school, my friend Michele told me that she wanted to be a nurse. I laughed and said she shouldn’t bother. She was too timid, queasy at the sight of horror movie blood, let alone the body fluid splattering of hospital nursing. Ignoring my lack of confidence, Michele applied to nursing school and proved me wrong. As a student, one of Michele’s first health care experiences was working as a home health aide assisting geriatrics. She gave an enema to an old woman who hadn’t had a bowel movement in a month. “Gross,” I said, but Michele focused on how happy she was to have given much-needed relief and care to this neglected woman. After graduation, Michele worked in labor and delivery, next cardiology, and now pediatrics. In the past few years, my friend’s nursing skills have become personal. As my mother’s health has faltered, Michele has been there for us.

At the onset of dementia, Mom became incontinent, but refused to wear an adult diaper. Shortly before she moved into a nursing home, Mom asked me to take her to visit Michele, who is like another daughter to her. Nervous that Mom would pee all over my car seat, I kept asking if she needed me to stop so that she could use the bathroom – and she kept answering “no.” We both arrived at Michele’s house successfully dry. But as we walked through the front door, my mother’s bladder gave way, soaking her pants, socks, and shoes. Mom was mortified, as was I, but Michele switched to professional mode, In the downstairs bathroom, Michele helped Mom clean up and change into dry underwear, socks, a pair of sweat pants, and her husband’s topsiders. Acting as if the accident had never happened, Michele soothed the tension with fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies. Mom forgot her humiliation as she held Michele’s little boy Peter on her lap and visited.

A year later, as a result of aspiration pneumonia, Mom was in an ICU on a ventilator. After working a long shift in the pediatrics unit of her hospital, Michele drove three hours to my mother’s bedside, where I stood anxiously reading the equipment monitors as the ventilator pushed air into her lungs. My nerves were frayed – I couldn’t tell if the ventilator was beeping from a momentary glitch or a sign that my mother wasn’t getting the oxygen that she needed. Michele reassured me that Mom’s color was good. She consulted with the nurses and gave me a therapeutic hug. I thought back to that day in high school. What if I had succeeded in discouraging Michele from pursuing her dream? I would have deprived many patients of an excellent nurse, a caring, competent, and compassionate human being. I have learned to respect and believe in people’s dreams. You never know how they will improve the world.

Reflections

It was a humbling experience to write this.

~Sharon Riley