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Renee CK

writer, editor, tweetable http://twitter.com/chicskirt

I'm a fun girl who's on a quest to figure it all out. I'm cynical but living the dream- I'm not sure how that happened exactly. Follow along in my blog for fun, mayhem, and merriment. There's never a dull day! (Or, go download my book!)...

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Housewife vs. Stay at Home Mom

real housewives of atlanta

I’ve admitted I’m a Bravo TV addict.  They’ve done the Real Housewives of Orange County, took a bite out of the Big Apple, and are now broadcasting my fair city, Atlanta.  I watched part of one show and was so turned off by these women who apparently do nothing yet have personal assistants, estate managers, (so they don’t have to deal with “those other people”) stylists, and designers coming to them.  The show had absolutely nothing to do with the real housewives of Atlanta that I know so I turned it off.

This morning Anderson Cooper from CNN was on Live with Regis and Kelly when I was just about to get up so I didn’t take the time to turn it off.  I heard Anderson talking about The Real Housewives of Atlanta.  Scooby Dooby Roooo???  Intelligent, sophisticated, mature Anderson Cooper watching women who spend their lives buying more to fill a void they won’t ever fill with labels?  He noticed too that these women don’t seem to do much despite being in various states of divorce.

Well, hell’s bells. If Anderson Cooper is watching this garbage, I should give it another try.  So, tonight since Dancing With the Stars’ elimination show started at 9 and I had to sit in my living room to ensure my kids staying in bed, I watched another episode of the Atlanta Housewives. There they were all getting ready for a birthday party and there was some tension that reminded me of a real life situation I have on occasion.  But, I never have a make up artist and hair stylist and designer/stylist come get me ready when I’m going to that awkward party. No, my labels are more like WAS: $69.95 NOW: $8.93 and my makeup artist is my daughter telling me “Mom! You have to wear this eyeshadow!” 

I wondered, (in my post-married-to-Big-Carrie-Bradshaw way) what is it that makes me and my friends different from these women. (Besides the posh lunches and being on a first name basis with employees at upscale designer stores?)  I prayed that anyone watching this did not equate the nonsense in front of me with the life I live.  They have lunches and the nanny picks the kids up from school in the “old” car, i.e. the Lexus SUV that they wouldn’t be seen dead in now that they have the Jag.  My friends and I meet not long after we drop our little darlings off so that we have ample time to catch up before we pick up our kids in our vehicles which are so close to dead that we use the battery as an AED.  We are worlds apart from these bitches. 

The difference lies in a slight difference in definition between the two species.  Housewife is someone who’s life is based out of her house.  It doesn’t have much to do with children, mainly just being in charge of a house.  Of course, the definition came from the 1950’s June Cleavers but those women were, in reality, what we now know as at-home-moms.  The primary responsibility of at-home-moms is to take care of children.  At first you’re home a lot but when the kids get older, the term at-home is almost sarcastic!  You barely do anything for yourself, let alone worry about getting a handbag that no one else is going to be carrying.  Hell, most likely, the purse of an at-home-mom wouldn’t be carried by anyone but the mom for all the spills, pen marks, scuffs, and other signs of wear and tear they receive.  Any appointments you do have must be fit in before the bus comes in the afternoon or after your spouse arrives home after work- and that’s for those of us who are still married. 

(ah!  My girls!  BFF Mary, me, Kari, and Christy)

We DO have to worry about budgets and when soccer practice is. Our estate manager is us!  So, while it upsets me that people think women who’s lives revolve around luxury vehicles, mansions, and thinking we’re sooooo good that we can’t even have our hair done in public is a real depiction of what wives in Atlanta do, I am hoping to set the record straight.  The reason you’re watching Housewives and not Stay-at-Home-Moms of Atlanta is because you’re looking for escape, something with a train wreck factor and the only train wreck factor you’re going to see in Stay-at-Home-Mom reality is when a child doesn’t so his or her chores or because we had to pull the cookies out of the oven so they’d cool before Scouts we’re pulled over for breaking land-speed records in order to make it to carpool without being at the very back of the line.  It’s not glamorous, but at the end of our run, we’ll have children who are more or less pleasant to be around. These women will be in therapy trying to justify the past 18 years showing their children love with parties that cost about half our annual budget and their kids will be in therapy as well because the only real love they ever received was from their nanny while mom was working out and her personal assistant planned her sweet 16. Tell ya’ what.  I’d rather be a boring ol’ stay-at-home-mom any day of the week!

Enjoy!

Renée