A bad weekend!

I had this bad feeling Thursday when David came home I was going to be in for a very trying weekend...I was right.

All weekend long I had to listen to him ,he has rages over the least little thing that happens. I honestly dont know if he is tired of me or just tired of life in general. Im happiest when he is at work. It has gotten to the point where I dont look forward to the weekend. 

The last thing I heard last night was him calling me a ignorant Muthaf**ker. No one should have to live like that. Yes, I know I deserve better.

At the same time, I can't work because I have a bloodbourne disease & I dont have a car (mine died on me). So , basically, David knows he has me right where he can abuse me. He knows better than to physically abuse me, I have a gun & he has to sleep sometime. I was abused for 3 years in my first marriage & it wont happen again. Its just , sometimes, those words can hurt worse than a slap. The words keeps replaying in your head & you can't forget them. 

All weekend consisted of put downs & him yelling at me. Finally , I had enough last night & I just stopped talking. I shut him out, even though he was in the same room. He realized I had tuned him out & he went to sleep.

 Wednesday David has a Dr appt with a hand specialist & it a hour's drive from our house. He wants me to go with him. Honestly, I would rather stay home. I feel like I should go ,but, after the way he treats me, then wants me to do things for him & go places with him. He got scatterbrained over the weekend & lost his eyeglasses, I think thats why he wants me to go. To fill out his paperwork.

Also over the weekend, I found out David has another son. One I have never met. Well, he has never  met him either (as far as I know). This son was concieved when David was dating his ex wife & seeing another girl on the side. The ex wife got pregnant & the girlfriend moved to Florida. The GF married someone else & wasnt heard of again until now.

She lives in the same town as we do. The way he treats me makes me wonder if he ever talks to this woman. I learned from my first marriage the tell tale signs of a cheating spouse. I had to learn the hard way. 

So many things happening at once.