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viewsI Am a Happy Woman: At Least That is What it Says in My Contract
By MetaxaCunningham, Sunday, March 6, 2011, 9 commentsWhen I was out of ideas on how to change my life to make it better, I came into the company of a wise woman. When she said, “I think I can help you,” I believed her. She told me that when she looked at me, she could see pain in my eyes. She could see that I was troubled; she saw right through me.
All of the pain and the doubt that I had been carrying with me, tumbled right out. I told her about my failed in vitro procedures and my inability to totally move on. I told her about feeling inadequate and lost. I expressed the shame I had for not reaching my potential in life – feeling that I could do so much more, be so much more. I talked about my lack of confidence and my fears.
For every negative assertion I gave her, she countered with an example that I had given her that proved I was strong, worthy, confident, intelligent. She showed me that what I am doing right now in my life is what I am supposed to be doing: growing as a person.
This wise woman asked me to close my eyes and dig deep into myself and tell her what I really wanted. After a few minutes of searching and speaking a hundred words that didn’t feel quite right, I found the truth. “What I really want is to be happy.”
“Are you willing to make a contract with yourself?” this wise woman asked.
“Yes.”
“Every morning, you must look in the mirror and say these words out loud: I am a happy woman. You must smile at yourself in the mirror and practice looking happy,” she said.
“How long am I supposed to do this?”
This wise woman took hold of my hands and looked me in the eyes and said, “Until it is true. This is your contract with yourself. It is up to you to make it true.”
That moment was life changing for me. I immediately felt myself exhale, as if I had been holding my breath for a very long time. In many ways I had been doing just that, not allowing myself to release so much anxiety and disappointment. Not allowing myself to breathe.
Before we parted ways, she hugged me and told me that I was intelligent, caring and beautiful. I believed her, partly because she is a wise woman and partly because in my heart I knew it to be true.
Every morning I tell myself that “I am a happy woman.” It is who I want to be. It is my contract with myself. I am beginning to feel the happiness rise in me in daily increments. I smile more. I breathe more. I relax.
Thank-you wise woman!
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9 Comments
Sounds like you are already on the happiness conveyor belt : )
I always liked this quote: 'thoughts over time become their physical equivalent'...
And I've been working hard on the same thing myself. We do have the power to be happy and to find peace. Thanks for the encouraging blog : )
P.S. I'm glad you had that talk with a very wise women...
It's always amazing to me how
It's always amazing to me how some people have the power to have such a strong effect on us with their positive and uplifting influence. I am so happy to hear that things are turning around for you, that you are beginning to feel happy again. I can very much relate to what you're saying in this post. And, I too, am very glad that your conversation with this wise woman has brought you some peace, happiness, and serenity. That's fantastic news and it makes me feel hopeful and inspired:-)
~Kimberly
Very inspiring...
I love this blog Metaxa. To us, you seem like you are who you want to be. "Believe it until it is true..." was that how it went? I love that advice.
I find it interesting also what you said about breathing and anxiety. We take it in, we let out. We are not supposed to hold on to it... Take care Metaxa!
Fight for Your Happy
I have been saying this for a few years now "I fight hard to keep my happy."
I am careful about what I watch on TV. I make sure the last thing I watch or hear is something funny. I search the air waves and friends for happy.... Some days, like you I am just going through the motions of it all. But one thing I know, my days of going through the motions are still far better than those when I did nothing but wait for happy to come...............
P.S. I LOVE the Contract with Yourself. .. I think I will use that from now on.
I love "I fight hard to keep
I love "I fight hard to keep my happy!" Keep fighting ladies!
Thank you
Thank you all for your lovely comments of encouragement. Having this contract with myself has been an amazing experience that I wanted to share. We can choose our state of mind. My choice is to be happy and not feel defeated. I am ready to be happy again!
Fight for Your Happy
I have been saying this for a few years now "I fight hard to keep my happy."
I am careful about what I watch on TV. I make sure the last thing I watch or hear is something funny. I search the air waves and friends for happy.... Some days, like you I am just going through the motions of it all. But one thing I know, my days of going through the motions are still far better than those when I did nothing but wait for happy to come...............
P.S. I LOVE the Contract with Yourself. .. I think I will use that from now on.
Fight for Your Happy
I have been saying this for a few years now "I fight hard to keep my happy."
I am careful about what I watch on TV. I make sure the last thing I watch or hear is something funny. I search the air waves and friends for happy.... Some days, like you I am just going through the motions of it all. But one thing I know, my days of going through the motions are still far better than those when I did nothing but wait for happy to come...............
P.S. I LOVE the Contract with Yourself. .. I think I will use that from now on.
Fight for Your Happy
I have been saying this for a few years now "I fight hard to keep my happy."
I am careful about what I watch on TV. I make sure the last thing I watch or hear is something funny. I search the air waves and friends for happy.... Some days, like you I am just going through the motions of it all. But one thing I know, my days of going through the motions are still far better than those when I did nothing but wait for happy to come...............
P.S. I LOVE the Contract with Yourself. .. I think I will use that from now on.
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