Earth Day Resolutions

On the "green scale" I would most likely be a turquoise or a very light celery. I try to be good to mother earth but haven't quite strapped on my Captain Planet gear and fought the good fight like so many great people out there. Like everyone I am touched by the posters of baby animals stranded in a monstrous landfill, and yes, I give my dollar to save the rainforest whenever a situation presents itself, but other than the occasional recycling and use of non-plastic bags- I simply SUCK.

I don't cut my 6-pack can rings so they don't get caught around the neck of a bird. I haven't pledged 40+ hours to the pick-up of my local highways and I am sad to say that all of my cleaning products are probably hazardous. But I want to change. I want to be better and maybe one day boost myself from turquoise to an electric lime. And maybe this Earth Day I could take a New Year's approach and make a resolution. Resolving to buy more Eco-friendly materials, have a smaller carbon footprint, and just make healthier choices in general.

Now, with all my Earth Day indiscretions on display, can I make two comments? Number 1: Thank you to all the amazing vibrantly green people out there who genuinely cry for mother earth and inspire the rest of us. Even if we don't always comply- you and your cause are always respected. Number 2: All you crazy hookers that throw your trash out of your window every other day and then decide to come in to work today sporting a "Save the Trees" t-shirt- SCREW YOU, YOU TRENDY WANNABE FAKERS! I saw that cigarette fly from your car yesterday afternoon and am gonna blow my horn like crazy if I see it again today!

So- Happy Earth Day everyone!