Why I Love Awards Shows

I am addicted to Hollywood awards shows. I love the Emmys, the Oscars and the Golden Globes. This addiction doesn't make sense because not only do I not read People or US Weekly,I rarely watch television except for Red Sox games.  And I never go to the movies.

Nevertheless, there I was lying on my couch last night under a big fluffy comforter, having a glass of wine and loving The Golden Globes even though I haven't seen "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button,"  "Frost/Nixon," "The Dark Knight," "FilmBolt," "Kung Fu Panda," or "Slumdog Millionaire." I hadn't even heard of "The Reader," "Revolutionary Road," "Doubt," "In Bruges," or "The Wrestler." In fact, the only nominated movie I had seen was "Wall-E."

As far as the nominated televisions shows, I have never watched "Dexter," "House," "In Treatment," "The Closer," or "True Blood." I've never seen "30 Rock" but I did see Tina Fey impersonate Sarah Palin on YouTube and I read a profile of her in "Vanity Fair".

I saw one episode of "Mad Men" and it was pretty good but I can never remember what channel or what night it's on. Of course I've seen "Law & Order" because it's on every channel, every night. I loved "Entourage" but I cancelled HBO to save money. And I've seen both "Brother & Sisters" and the made-for-television-movie "Coco Chanel," but I wish I hadn't.

So what possesses me to watch awards shows? Sure I love fashion, but that isn’t it. I prefer every day style to ball gowns. (Side note: what was Rene Zellweger thinking? Tell me that dress was not made by Caroline Herrera, please.)

Right before a commercial, I figured it out. The cameras panned all of the celebrities sitting at their tables. I saw an actor infamous for verbally abusing his daughter, another alleged to have a drug problem, and an actress known to have an ego bigger than the state of Texas. And I saw their coworkers sitting next to them all dressed up with pasted on smiles. "Life is good," they tried to portray. "I love my coworkers and we are one big happy family. I love my job," they tried to tell the camera.

And it hit me. Hollywood awards shows are to celebrities what office holiday parties are to us mere mortals: hell! Because for the actors, actresses, producers and directors, the awards shows are first and foremost a work function. Sure their work parties are held at The Beverly Hilton or the Kodak Theater and ours are held at the Dedham Hilton or the Chateau Restaurant, known for its family style dining and Keno. And sure they wear couture while we wear TJ Maxx. But location and wardrobe are the only differences.

The similarities are much greater. Whether you are a Hollywood star or an office file clerk, at least one night a year you are forced to dress up in uncomfortable clothes, sit down to a rubber chicken dinner, and wonder who from the company is going to drink too much. Most importantly, you paste a smile on your face and pretend you like your coworkers even though they may be drug addicts, ego maniacs or just terrible bores. You laugh at their tasteless jokes, sidestep their gropes and kiss your boss' ass. Then you go home grateful you won’t have to do it again for another year.

So that is why I like awards shows. It's nice to be reminded that the beautiful people are just like you and me.