MICROSKIRTS
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viewsNew Year Revolution
By LeahSenona, Tuesday, December 27, 2011, 2 comments
A writer is a listener, an observer. Holiday gatherings are a feast of interesting thoughts, ideas, and conversations from which the writer can take away as much as her mind can hold. I love the meeting of minds, values, and beliefs that define many holiday family get-togethers.
On Christmas, I enjoyed spending time with my husband’s family. The conversation flowed easily from politics, through recipes, to plans for the future. There is one conversation in particular, though, that I have been pondering since that afternoon. I listened to someone describe her battle against body image issues. We’ve discussed the issue many times since we both struggle against a distorted view of ourselves. She told me that one day, as she stood in the bathroom, she simply decided that she was no longer going to let negative thoughts about her body stay inside her mind. She had her fill of wasting time and energy on the lies her mind told her and she was done. As I listened to her describe the peace she has enjoyed since that day, I silently wished that I could feel the same.
My own negative thoughts about myself, ranging through a wide variety of subjects, drain my energy and confidence away. The constant dripping turns into a steady trickle that, at different times, becomes an open floodgate immersing me in a litany of my insecurities, doubts, and fears. Fighting myself saps me of the strength I must have if I want to positively impact those around me and the world at large. In addition to the lack of vim and vigor caused by my negative thinking, I have also discovered that thinking negatively about myself encourages me to think negatively about others as well. Frankly, I am tired of the cycle and I am choosing to end it.
The year is nearly over. The triumphs and mistakes of 2011 can only be relived in my mind. My gift to myself for the new year is the refusal to bring negative thoughts about myself into 2012. I can wallow as much as I want in my flaws, failures, mistakes, and faux pas for the next few days, but when the clock strikes midnight on January 1st all that baggage stays in the old year. The life I want to live is too important to waste time on bemoaning my own imperfection.
The new year deserves a new attitude. What will you leave in 2011?
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2 Comments
Cheers to You ~~
Dearest Leah ~~ Honestly, I laugh at the part of you who is hard and unkind to yourself - parts of yourself. Part of the wonderful gift of being WAY older (than you) is that blessed gift of what serves and lifts, what doesn't. Also, what is true and what isn't (well, that will be ongoing). But I can tell you, and you know I know (haha), that YOU, my dear, are a positive, beautiful, gorgeous presence in this world (add in intelligent, courageous, seeking, opening, living).
A wonderful technique is to heighten awareness of negative self-talk...gotta start where one is.
Notice, observe (two things you are extremely good at already).
Soften or invite, develop, strengthen the part of yourself who are kind, loving, giving, compassionate (aspects of you that are already generous to and for others).
Make space for these to be together ~ share space in you together ~ every thought, every feeling is invited because, "closed/slammed" doors beg to be banged on, to be figured out how to get in, so welcome "her" in and LOVE HER. Love her "anyway" while encouraging and communicating what the other (loving) side of you wants/suspects/chooses/knows.
I hope that was written clearly enough ~
Be very curious (a good Leah trait) about how to love "even though" another mind-voice proclaims to believe differently.
Clearly, this is MY want for you and I temper this with your pacing, timing, choice, and way you choose that is right and good for you. Just because I don't have any doubts, I understand that you must do it your way and I'm totally cheesed for you to discover and see the amazing Leah as I do...and better!! Cheers, Dear One. xoxoxo love, heather
Oh, Heather...what would I do
Oh, Heather...what would I do without you? I am so blessed by the relationship we have been able to share through Skirt! and Facebook. Thank you for your ever-encouraging presence in my life. I appreciate you.
Your wisdom adds so much to my life. The reminder that "[e]very thought, every feeling is invited because, "closed/slammed" doors beg to be banged on, to be figured out how to get in" is much needed. Thank you!
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