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viewsMy Apology to the Skinny Bitches
By krrobi, Wednesday, December 30, 2009, 12 comments ~~~Starting the New Year off Right for 2010….
~~My Apology to the Skinny Bitches
~First of all I must disclose that I have no idea what it feels like to be a skinny bitch. I’ve never been one. My world has been consumed by diet after rotten diet: Weight Watchers, Grapefruit diets, Cabbage diets, Poop Your Pants diets, and Starve Yourself To Death diets. I am sorry, but I do not have empathy or sympathy or identify in any way with the skinny bitch--who after eating a couple grapes exclaims, “Ooooh, I’m stuffed!”
Nope. I sure don't.
{PICTURE IT}: Eighth grade gym class. I’m standing next to Sue Ramos and she doesn’t know I exist. She’s a supermodel. A Freaking Farah Fawcett lookalike. A bitch with thighs that don’t touch.
Ms.Turnbloom is making us do jumping jacks, which I despise because my boobs are too big and my bra is too small and I’m utterly out of shape, but Ramos is performing them fluidly, flawlessly and ferociously.
Anyway, did I tell you that Turnbloom used to be a member of the S S? At any rate, she suddenly crinkles up her ugly little Hitler mustache and screams in front of the entire gym class, “Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey, Sistoooooooooo, lets get those legs moving, Missy!
Ramos looks over at me with this scoff glowing from her perfect green eyes, and believe me, it isn’t a scoff like ha-ha-ha….the scoff looks more like Damian from that film, “The Omen.” Yeah, it’s more like, “You don’t even deserve to breathe the same air that I’m breathing, Fatty.”
That’s when it all started…this sort of hatred for skinny bitches. And for myself.
Where was I going with this?
Oh, yeah, so recently I wrote this blog called “Curvy Girls in, Skinny Bitches Out,” because, well, I feel society and the media worship and idolize bony, skeletal, ribs protruding, heroine chic, Victoria Secret looking chicks. And it pisses me off. Royally.
I MEAN, NOBODY…AND I’M SCREAMING THIS NOW WITH BOLD UPPER CASE LETTERS AND BLACK INKY INK…NOBODY, HAS THE RIGHT OR THE INCLINATION TO TELL US WHAT WE SHOULD LOOK LIKE!
Women DO NOT like being told what to do. Ever.
“Curvy Girls” is about curves and sexiness and health. I do confess- I was a bit nasty when I spoke about a few of the skinny bitches such as Kate Moss, Paris Hilton, Posh Spice, and all of the girls out there that fit into a negative- frickin- 0.
Sometimes I just can’t help myself.
But a letter I received from a formal model after writing “Curvy Girls” made me reevaluate my stereotypical view on this issue. Read below…
“In response to "Curvy Girls IN, Skinny Bitches OUT." Well I'm a skinny girl and not very curvy (small boobs, small butt, skinny waist, etc)...so what does that make me? A figment of someone's imagination? I'm sorry...but I just get so sick of that phrase. It really doesn't help much. Sure, it might help bigger girls, but it makes me feel uglier than any runway show or modeling agency ever could...especially when I hear it all the time. I think we could've at least come up with a phrase that helps all body shapes and sizes instead of just ONE....the curvy one. It's just as bad as saying that only skinny bodies are "real" or "beautiful.”
I swished her bitter syllables around in my mind for a few minutes, considered her point of view. I thought about high school; about how I longed for a small butt, small boobs, and a skinny waist; about how I envied, adored and despised Ramos at the same time. I thought about all of those things I've held onto for so many decades.
And I thought about about how women are never satisfied with what they have or who they are
After much pondering, I finally came to a conclusion.
We cannot be defined by our physical body or the size of our jeans. NO. Who we are comes from within, not from without-- whether we wear a size 14 or a size 2, whether we are curvaceous or thin, whether we are overweight or underweight. Whatever.
Hell, we're pretty much the same when you peel back the skin ....
So this is my heartfelt apology to the skinny bitches out there who I’ve offended, envied, despised, and misunderstood for so many years. Nobody informed me, until now, that we have more in common than I ever imagined.
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12 Comments
You go, Kim! You're so
You go, Kim! You're so right... We should look at each other for what's inside, not out. This should apply to weight, height, race, religion, sexual preference, etc. No labels we or society puts on ourselves truly matter. It's the inside that counts, sista!
Well said, Kim :) I think
Well said, Kim :) I think everyone has their insecurities. When I saw the picture at the top of your blog, I cringed and said a quick "shame on us" for using this young woman as the "model" of beauty. It's not healthy and being my practical self, I had to wonder what it's doing to her internally. Health insurance companies charge LESS for someone slightly overweight than underweight. And when you get right down to it, I bet we all are much more alike than we might think and THAT makes me happy!
I just read this earlier
I just read this earlier this morning; I think it's a good sign of a shift in tastes:
"According to a recent poll, the beautiful Kate Winslet has the most desirable celebrity body.
We have to admit she does look fab! Especially after having kids.
Also included on the list is Halle Berry, Cheryl Cole, Beyonce, Megan Fox & Lily Allen.
What's more surprising is which celebs are on the bottom of the list: Kate Moss, Katie Price and Victoria Beckham all have a desirability of 1%.
Guess being skinny, orange, and having big fake tittays is out.
Dr Jacquie Lavin, who commissioned the YouGov poll, says "it shows a positive shift that women are more likely to see Kate Winslet and Kelly Brook as the ideal body shape rather than Kate Moss or Victoria Beckham.""
I think it's a shame how
I think it's a shame how women have been made to feel about their bodies. Kim, I HIGHLY suggest you read "Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul." It touches on so much of what you write about, and I think you'd really dig it. At any rate, there's been a massive assault on the female psyche through the media, and it's got to stop. Bigger girls are made to feel ugly and unimportant, but the truth is that even skinny girls have their own struggles. At the end of the day, we're all women being defined by our appearances, and we're constantly being told we're not good enough. Great post, and Happy New Year! <3
What an amazing post. It
Stephanie Davis Smith
National Web Editor of skirt.com
Great post Kim...as always!
Proud of you Kim. I have
Proud of you Kim. I have been too skinny a lot and now I am not but I still struggle with feeling unloved, under appreicated and invisible because of the extra weight. doesn't that just suck? I don't have the time to feel bad. I have to find the time to applaud me for all I have done in my life. whether my damn thighs touch or not!
I do remeber girtls like that in school that made us all feel bad but there is karma and I have to say if you are an ugly soul when you are young & skinny and don't change your heart, it will show up on your face and soul later on.
Sisterhood is Powerful and that is what the female population needs to remember!
Awaken the Real You. Redifine...Reinvent...Release. Branching Out LIfe Coaching
skinny bitches?
Great way to start the New Year!!!
Great post Kim. Awesome. Reminds me that it's OK not to be a size 1 or zero....I was much skinner after a numbing divorce diet, but I'm back to "normal." And between spanx and actually buying things that FIT, I think I clean up pretty good!
Beautiful post
I enjoyed seeing your compassion for the "SBs" come through here. It's hard to be confident if we're demonizing anyone either for being fat or thin. Having been both, I can't say I've personally found any direct correlation with my size and happiness, although I might feel differently if I were in the public eye and expected to be thin. I do know any negative judgment I've ever made about any woman about anything has come around eventually to bite me in the (thin or thick) behind! Graceful apologies and broadmindedness like you've shown here, on the other hand, can only create good karma--and you deserve it, Kim! Happy New Year and while I'm here, thank you for your support as a fellow Skirtsetter--I really appreciate all you do to help build a community!
Kim, As usual you are
Kim,
As usual you are funny poignant and write on!!!!! I have been a skinny bitch (not for a long time), a curvy bitch and an in between a skinny and curvy bitch!!! None of it felt good until I was accepting of "This is my body and I am proud of it bitch!!! By the way..I am now an inbetween a skinny and curvy bitch! Thanks again for your thoughts..I always love them!!!
In love and Peace,
Wolffie
www.wolffieswords.blogspot.com
Ha ha ha. I love you.
One of the things that I have always loved about this forum is that sometimes, your mind gets opened a little more than it was before. This is just one more example of that. I think the real issue with most of us (skinny gals, un-skinny gals, gals with thighs that don't touch, gals with thighs that do touch) is that somehow, our body-type is supposed to be indicative of our worth. But to whom? I mean, in a world where even supermodels are airbrushed down to nothing, what woman is ever going to feel up to those kinds of standards? I'm a size 2 right now, but I can tell you that I don't have that flawless glow that I see in the glossy-mags. I don't have an ass that I'd allow to be seen hanging out of the bottom of a pair of shorts, I can tell you that. On the otherhand, having been "thereapized" into oblivion, I can tell you that what I HAVE done is effectively relieved myself of taking on the responsbility of trying to look like someone in a magazine. All I can look like is. . well. . .me. And that's enough (for right now. Who knows? Next week, I'll be curled up in a fetal position crying and bitching because "none of my clothes fit (sob) I have nothing to way-hay-hayerrrr.")
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