Straight or Gay...why do we need labels?

I was inspired this morning after reading one of the featured blogs ("Are Men Making Women Gay). It is completely true that our culture has shifted with regard to the acceptance of sexual orientation but to suggest that this shift is in any way connected to men is appalling to me. In fact, I could easily write an entire blog bashing Dr. Sax and his research, but what good would that do? However, before I move on, let me ask a very simple question...does anyone have the power to "make" someone gay? It's idiotic to me that a well-educated researcher would even suggest such a thing! 

A lot of energy and passion has been expended on the whole "nature versus nurture" debate as it relates to sexual orientation. My question is: does it really matter? Our society is so bent on labeling everything, from political affiliation to religious beliefs, we want to fit everyone into tidy little boxes. And, truth be told, once we put someone into a box what usually follows is some type of judgement. We all do it. Take a moment and read the following labels one by one, pausing in between, and see what immediately comes to your mind: 

     CHRISTIAN

     LESBIAN

     REPUBLICAN

     VEGAN

Chances are what followed in your mind after you read each of the above words was a string of characteristics describing how you view a person wearing that label. Depending on your world view those descriptions were either positive or negative in nature. I wonder how often we miss getting to know someone on a deeper level because we put them into a box with a label on it? Imagine with me for a moment what our culture would be like without labels. What if how you vote or which God you follow didn't describe who you are but rather, simply, something you believe in? What if a woman fell in love with another woman not because she's a lesbian but because she was attracted to the qualities and unique characteristics of that other person? What if you could be a vegan without owning a pair of Birkenstocks and continuing to shave your legs?

When we label someone we devalue them in many ways. We take all that is unique about them and squeeze it into a neat little box that makes us somehow more comfortable. One of the great things about living in America is that we are not forced into a belief system by our government. America is the land of the free where life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness is our right as a citizen. Unfortunately we, as individuals, try to dictate what it means to be free and make judgements about whether another's pursuit of happiness is acceptable to us. The whole labeling thing is like a virus that feeds on itself. Those that are gay fight to be accepted only to turn around and judge straight people for being narrow minded. Christians are passionate about the love of Jesus until they walk past an abortion clinic and suddenly they become angry and hateful. When does it end?

I made a decision a couple of years ago to throw away my labeling gun. For a while I still kept the little pocket sized one in my purse just in case I needed it but I've since discarded that one too. Sometimes I find myself unconsciously reaching for it...in fact I was looking all over the house for a label gun after reading about Dr. Sax's research on men making women gay this morning! It's not easy to keep people out of boxes but it is much more liberating and enjoyable.