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viewsThe Beauty of Diversity
By kimkelly, Friday, March 12, 2010, 4 comments
I find myself being preoccupied with the subject of diversity this morning after reading a few blogs about the Mississippi prom that was cancelled in order to prevent a lesbian couple from attending. It's amazing to me that so many of us would prefer a monochromatic world. We so often choose to respond from a place of fear rather than a place of love, of acceptance. We hold to our beliefs as though our very survival depended upon it and, tragically, we frequently consider those beliefs to be of greater value than the life of another.
It saddens me that the beauty of diversity is so often unseen. Surprising though, is that many who live alternatively - and who are repeatedly judged and discriminated against because of their choices - also miss the splendor of diversity. It's true; I've seen it with my own eyes. I have a number of friends who are happily living non-traditional lives. Recently a group of us got together to eat, drink and be merry and I found myself being caught off guard by the stereotypes several of them held toward suburban housewives. Having been a suburban housewife, I understand why my friends think that way but am still disheartened by their misconceptions.
Being judgmental of someone’s lifestyle is only a symptom of a far greater problem. The deeper issue, I believe, is that we fail to see that we are all connected. If I truly believe that I am connected to you and you to me, then I will be compelled to treat you with respect and love because how I treat you will ultimately affect me. And let me take this a step further and say that I’m not a fan of tolerance. Encarta defines tolerance as “the act of putting up with somebody or something irritating or otherwise unpleasant.” I don’t know about you but the thought of someone “putting up with me” doesn’t exactly warm my heart!
I’m not sure of the solution to this issue but I’m convinced it’s not something we can regulate with laws or referendums. I’m not saying those things don’t have an important place in society, they absolutely do. However, the crafting of a law is not enough to change the hearts of those governed by that law. It didn’t work with segregation and it won’t work with gay marriage. The solution must be more organic in nature to shift the culture of our nation. Vision has to be caught not taught. It starts with you and with me, as individuals, choosing to treat others honorably whether anyone else follows our lead. It requires seeing the intrinsic value of others whether we agree with them or not.
As I grow older I find myself relishing the beauty of engaging with others who think and live differently than I do. I feel a deep longing to continually experience a vibrant, colorful world that is void of black and white beliefs. I am seeking to honor those I come in contact with, whether I understand them or not, and in doing so I believe that I can affect those in my sphere of influence. Perhaps Rumi said it best when he wrote “Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing, there is a field. I'll meet you there.” As you and I move past our judgments and into acceptance maybe, just maybe, others will follow us to that field where diversity is beautiful.
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4 Comments
Sad
It's sad what lengths some people would go to to force others into their way of thinking, those young women deserve the right to be happy just as all the other attendees.
I liked your blog. I had
I liked your blog. I had never really thought about what you said... that laws cannot govern/ change hearts. How true that is. At best, thost type laws are like training wheels,,, they begin to teach by showing tracks for others to follow. Don't know if you read Oprah's magazine, but there was a great interview last month with a (Vietnamese???) spiritual leader who talks at the end of his interview about recognizing yourself in everything and everyone, and that kinship that you speak of.
Thank you!
I very much appreciate comments and especially your analogy of the training wheels and tracks! I read O magazine from time to time and I believe I know of the gentleman you were speaking of. I'll have to get a copy of this months issue and check it out! Again, thank you for your thought-provoking response.
"You've go to be taught to
"You've go to be taught to hate and fear. You've got to be taught from year to year. It's got to be drummed in your dear little ear. You've got to be carefully taught.:" There are no bigger hypocrits than the religious fanatics who preach brotherly love while condemning anyone who doesn't fit their definition of "brother.". There is a reason our forefathers wanted a separation of church and state, but intolerance grows exponentially as that line grows fainter.
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