#26 in a Series...There's No Place Like Home

Mike’s coming home tomorrow—for a month!  The semester is over, he’s done grading papers, and he’ll be here in about 24 hours.  I’m so relieved.  We’re about a quarter of the way through our “divide and conquer” time. 

Yesterday I stopped in a coffee shop across town, hoping to see Jason, a former student who is the manager there.  I met him when he was a chubby eleven year-old whose mom had signed him up for dance class.  Now he’s a handsome, trim and self-assured 22 year-old who rushed around the counter to hug me, exclaimed over how grown up Daphni is, and took time out to talk shop about our mutual passion—tap dance. 

I told Jason I’d seen the photos from his recent wedding on his Facebook page.  He flashed his 100-watt smile, and said, “I remember a couple years ago, telling you about this girl I had met in Seattle…how I really liked her, but I didn’t know if it would work out…we lived so far apart.  And now…we’re married!”  He flashed his silver wedding band, and looked a little giddy, like he still couldn’t believe his luck.  And he is a very lucky man.  She’s darling.  I can’t wait to meet her.

I told him about Mike living in Texas, and Jason looked taken aback, like he couldn’t imagine being separated from his bride.  So much the better for him.  He’s still building his team. 

Mike is my teammate, my best friend.  Mike’s faith in me has never waivered, even when I didn’t deserve it.  I hope he thinks I deserve it now.

He’s done great work this semester, juggled his life without his personal assistant (me), and jetted all over the globe in the name of economics.  He’s fighting the good fight to make the world a better place.  His students think he’s a rock star.

What have I been up to, besides wrecking the lives of everyone around me?

I’ve learned a thing or three.

Y’all know I’m working on my control freakiness.  I’ve had an epiphany about my relationship with my mom and how it affects my dealings with the people I love.

I’m learning to love myself more, and it’s harder than you would think.  Loving yourself doesn’t mean being narcissistic, though I certainly have to guard against that.  I need to accept myself, and nurture myself, just as I should do with the rest of my loved ones.

I don’t want to fear being alone when Daphni goes to college.  She deserves her chance to fly without feeling guilty about leaving me. 

I continue to work toward being a writer, solo for now.  I want a career, or at least an avocation, that I can pursue no matter where in the world I go next.

I think I’m creeping closer to being the person I want to be.  I’ll backslide, for sure.  But I’ll keep trying.

Maybe the early termination of our living experiment has spurred Kelly and me into more self-reflection than we expected.  Maybe we’ll end up sitting next to each other at graduation in 2013 and marvel at how things played out. 

If this were fiction, I’d never have written it this way.  How’s this for a weird plot twist:

Kelly has been talking to her…ex.  They’re going on a date next weekend.  They're not telling the boys until they have a chance to figure things out, so keep it under your hat, ok? 

I was really surprised when she told me, but at the same time it made sense.  They were married for over two decades, and have two children together.  The next phase in their lives is an empty nest, just like Mike and me.  And after that we’ll probably all become…grandparents.  Will they end up growing old together?  It makes sense to take a second look and evaluate why they loved each other in the first place.  To try and remember when they couldn’t imagine being separated—even for one night. 

There’s no place like home, really.

Kelly’s family has made plans to spend Christmas together, just the four of them, for the first time in six years.   I will wait with baited breath to see how it goes.  I’m rooting for the good guys.  All of ‘em.    

I’m sure they’ll take it slow.  But not me.  Tomorrow, I’m gonna click my heels against Mike’s…three times.