My pulse-quickening moment with Edward Cullen

One time last year, I was prancing around Borders like a puppy among pricey yet oh-so-chewy heels. There were already three books under my left arm and I was giggling over the snarky jacket copy of the fourth book I’d later purchase.

When I glanced up, there was a guy. An extremely attractive guy, mind you, with dark hair and high cheekbones, a ways away, past a few bookcase displays. There he was, STARING RIGHT AT ME.

Ooooh, my! Cue the fluster factor. I pretended to read the jacket copy again but forgot to make my eyeballs move.

I considered checking behind me for his hottie-pants girlfriend or wife but I didn’t hear any footsteps or winter boots squeaking and the place was drop-a-pin quiet. It was better not to risk one of those horribly nerdy “Who? Me?” bits from the movies when Hot Guy notices Geeky Girl and Geeky Girl is shocked, anyway.

Play it cool.

I glanced again, but pretended to search for the travel section and accidentally met his eyes.

Huuuuh! HE’S STILL LOOKING AT ME. And did he get better looking?

Pulse quickened. Legs stiffened.

Should I walk over there? No, let him come to you. Wait, no, that’s dumb. Come on, this isn’t the 1950s. Just go!

I walked in his direction and scanned the bookcases and the little signs atop them that identify the topics.

When I felt it was safe to glance his way, it stopped me entirely and books nearly shook from my arms.

Hot Guy wasn’t actually a guy at all. He was a life-size cardboard cutout of EDWARD CULLEN. A teenage heartthrob vampire. Seriously.

YEEESH! Get a grip, Jody. Pathetic! Good Lord! That tops it all.

I darted to an aisle with architecture books or something like that.What if someone saw me making eyes with a flipping cardboard cutout?! I listened for a snicker in the distance. Nothing.

Ten seconds ticked by before I was able to emerge, red cheeks and all. I passed Mr. Cullen and laughed. At myself.

Sure, I read one of the Twilight books and saw the movies but I guess the image of him hadn’t been etched in my mind to enable immediate recognition.

Also, for the record, I wasn’t wearing my glasses so I couldn’t exactly see the sparkly paleness or the glowing eyes.