My Irrational Fears

Have we talked about this? I can honestly not remember. I hope not- cuz this down below here is guud stuff. 

I'm suffer from what professionals like to call General Anxiety Disorder, or what I like to call Crazy McCrazerson's disease.  I worry all the time.  I'm fairly certain I worry in my sleep. I definitely worry when I'm awake. But it's cool.  It's good.  Up until recently planning for Plan A, B, C, D....U, and V has allowed me to be wildly successful in most of my endeavors.  (Boom, you see that I just gave myself a compliment.  Like whoa.  The therapy, the pills, the standing naked in front of a mirror talking to oneself...it's all coming together now.)  But now...beeteedubs it's a pain in the ass and really just not working for me.  I lay awake at night worrying about what color stain to choose for our hard wood flooring (that we don't yet have) and will the color I choose make the house less or more marketable when we sell our house, if we sell our house, because let's be real this is all hypothetical worrying. 

In an attempt to help myself see the ridiculousness of my worrying, and because I had a chat with someone about this today, and because I needed a blog topic I've decided that I'm going to list my most irrational fears....drum roll please. 

Here are my current TOP 5 (in no particular order)

1. My baby (that has not been produced yet) will be ugly.  I have no intention of making a baby anytime soon, in fact up until most recently I did not even want a baby.  And now I am worried when/if I have one it will be ugly.  There's nothing worse than an ugly baby.  It's what jokes are made of.  And my fiance has hair on the end of his nose, I have a weird dent in my head and I fear that if the two of us make a wee one it will get the worst of our physical attributes- let alone what its personality will be like- YIKES.

2.  My teeth are going to fall out.  This is actually a reoccuring dream I have.  Over and over since I was a child.  My teeth fall right out of my face at any given moment. 

3.  I'm going to say I love you to someone on the phone whilst at work.  Like I'm not going to be paying attention and I go "yea ok love you bye" like I do when I'm on the phone with my fiance and I'm not paying attention to my fiance.  But it won't be my fiance.  It will be someone professional.  There's no coming back from something like that. It haunts me daily.

4.  I will fart while sneezing in public.  This sucks and I know so because I have done it.  My name is Jenniefromthe603 and I have sharted in public.

5. Something disasterous related to my house.  It's kind of like a madlib kind of like a fill in the blank section of an exam:

It _______(weather event) today and subseqently we have a _______ (house maintenance issue) which will cost $ _____ (some ungodly amount of money) to fix.  For example:  It snowed again and subsequently we have an ice dam and 20 feet of snow on our roof ..... get it?  So then I lay in my bed at night thinking.  The roof is going to collapse.  We need to lock the animals downstairs during the day, will a roof collapse be covered under our Homeowners' policy, etc. etc.

Oh! one more 6. - Do I have food in my teeth.  This is why I eat pizza with a fork.  And today the answer was YES.  hmpf.

until next time folks...

seeyoulaterbyebyeciao!

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