Musings from a jilted drunk

First of all, if you have never tried Labneh, you MUST. Go to the nearest Middle Eastern market in your nearest hippy corner of town.

Second of all, why do men not have the BALLS to just say what they mean? I'm sayin: do you have to say the L word? do you have to say that I mean the world to you? that we will always be close? that I am like nobody else? that theres not anyone else that you can talk to the way you talk to me?

Wait, wait. let me  tell you what happend after two months of THAT. The d-bag, ever honest, tells me for several weeks how a few different girls are in hot pursuit. great, whatever; I am THE least jealous person on this planet so I'm like....awww, habibi (my dear) dont worry about it. You're mine. Blah blah vomit in my face.

Then comes up to me at the bar last weekend: "this girl wants to go home with me, and so does this one. I dont know what to do." We arent technically dating cause we are both WAY cooler together when we aren't, so I'm like...um...."its up to you sweetheart." And I get "well, I dont know...." To which I respond "well, that sort of IS your decision, then, eh??"

Then he goes home with one of her.

I was batgirl the day after. It rocks to completely wallow.

Wine is really cool. Makes me happy. I shouldnt start smoking but I'm afraid its happening. Slowly but surely.

When you think about it (not that I have), this is actually sort of the worst thing that anyone has ever done to me, boy-wise. Which is something, since I've had a lot bigger heartaches than this. But in the traditional sense, this is so freaking CLASSICly 'man screws girl over.' Am I right??

West Wing is the BEST. But the episode to watch when youre drunk is NOT the one abotu the President's daughter being kidnapped. In fact, the thing to publish on the internet is NOT ramblings of a 5 day later jilted chica living in Iraq. Yeah, I guess that means I'm not the Gringette in Beirut anymore. I'm the Gringette in Kurdistan, the hole of a spot that wants to be a country but isnt and has more disgusting sexist groping men than a prison in Jersey.

Here IS something worth reading/writing/listening to: Its from "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert. I am no Oprah fan, but she sort of inadvertantly put this one in my pause

"its better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitarion of somebody else's life with perfection"
YES. New Best Phrase Ever. Comes from some Guru in India or sommat.

I want some cheese. And to be in America. Specifically South Carolina. In the fall. amongst loved ones. But if I cant be, this is exactly my second choice. Kicking ass, training for a marathon, applying for grad school, drinking wine, being ME, eating Labneh, getting jilted, teaching and nurturing Iraqi kids. RIGHT HERE.

think I'm gonna eat some wholegrain digestives.