SKIRT! Team Challenge, Mind: When to trust yourself

 Yes, this is how my week went last week.  I spoke about a portion of my trust issues that I am dealing with last week and what rears its ugly head but another side of the trust triangle.  I  am going to try and sum this up rather quickly, so here I go.

I allowed my daughter to go to a bible study meeting with a friend of ours while I was working, I came home from work aroud 9:15vp.m. or so.  At about 9:45 I decide to call my friend to see if they were on their way home(being it was a school night and all).  She didn't answer, I was a little worried at that point, but not to bad.  I tried to call again after twenty minutes and still no answer, by this time I am frantic and I am thinking of all the horrible things that could be happening.  I have known my friend for a little while now and I do trust her.  But I made my self nuts with all the awful thoughts going through my head at that time.  I thought what if it is a cult church and they are sacrificing my child, what if they had a car accident, what if someone came into the church and no one saw him take her.  I know, I know I went way off the deep end on those, but those are the thoughts that went through my mind.  I was in and out of my car with anxiety, I wanted to drive over to the church and pick her up.  I bet my heart was going a mile a minute.  I should have fainted from all the stress I put myself under.  I think this is one of the down sides of abuse, my ability to trust is shot and when it comes to my children it is worse.  I am trying to work through a lot of these issues so I don't propel them onto my children.  Needless to say she came home around 10:45, and my friend called me when they were on their way home.  I felt compelled to let my friend know why i was so frantic and she did understand.  I felt really bad that I didn't trust her enough to know she woud take good care of my child.  Pray for me please, this type of stress and mistrust is killing me on the inside.  

FoxC1