The Selfish Friend

You know, I’m a good friend.  Hands down.  I’m there when needed.  I let my friends cry, complain, and rant.  I try to understand and not judge, well, most of the time.  Sometimes, I can give the ol’ kick in the butt too.  I’ve been known to jack a few collars (metaphorically, of course). 

But ya know, I’ve had a long time friend (and I use that term loosely) that is so selfish.  In short, I’m a better friend to her than she’ll ever be to me because of that very same reason.  And to tell you the truth, she’s one of those people that REALLY needs a friend.  I think that’s why I’ve put up with her so long.  She has issues on top of issues and sometimes she’s down right pitiable.  But honey, let her get a leg up and its phht! 

I’m a big girl, I know people lead busy lives, but family, I’m talking about ugly behavior like giving you the cold shoulder, moodiness, and outright arrogance!  I’ve gone periods of years where I didn’t communicate with her.  I wasn’t mad either, just made up my mind to be through with that situation.  Who needs it, right?  Anyway, in the last year, we have started talking and checking in with each other again. 

She’s improved a bit, but I so still have my guard up.  But sometimes, in one of those rare moments when I forget who I’m dealing with, she reminds me…I’m still that selfish, moody, pitiable person inside and it will take more than you to change me.  I won’t go into all the gory details but let’s just say she proves true to form.  Today, however; was one of my ‘jack your collar’ days.  I let her know in the I-love-you-but-this-is-how-it-is-heifer tone.  It was long overdue.  It came out with such ease that I surprised myself. 

Love that.