The Myth of "The One Big Thing" and Saying Yes

I’ve been thinking about this topic for a long, long, time and I could probably write a 300 page dissertation on it but I need to start somewhere and that somewhere is here.

There’s a big myth floating around out there.  Let’s call it the “One Big Thing” myth.  And let’s say that waiting around for the “One Big Thing” is paralyzing and a dream killer.

Remember the story behind the musical 42nd Street where Peggy Sawyer goes in a chorus girl and comes out a star?   Such a romantic notion, such a big lie.  It perpetuates the myth that you can have one big break, one big thing that catapults your life or career from oblivion into the stratosphere.

There’s no such thing as a big break, as that one big thing that changes everything.

What About Oprah?

People like to use the Oprah Winfrey show as an example of that one big thing that can “make” a career.   I have news for you–no one who goes on Oprah is unknown or unsuccessful.  No one gets pulled from obscurity and gets discovered on Oprah.  They’re already book authors, business owners,  running a charity or whatever it is they do.  They’ve already made their way, they’re already doing the work, and being on the show just allows them to play a bigger game.

And yet so many of us are waiting for “the one big thing” before we really step out, before we start taking chances on our own behalf. We want someone to see and recognize what we’ve known about ourselves all along…We want someone to discover our genius; see, hear and witness our greatness in a way that tells the world:  look at her, she really is special, she does know, she is great at what she does.

We’re looking for the permission slip from the Universe that says: Yes, you can do it.

The most powerful Yes is the one you say to yourself.

Waiting for the outside YES is just feeding the hungry ghost.  There are never enough of them and you need to keep seeking the Yes over and over with each new situation that you’re in. I’m not saying that support and people who believe in you aren’t important–they most definitely are.  And I’m not denying the effect of big recognition, but if you haven’t said yes to yourself, the yes you receive from the outside has nothing to resonate with.

There comes a time in life when you have to commit to getting on your own team, to taking a stand, to  stepping out for yourself.  And
I’m not saying that it’s easy.  It’s hard.  I wish I had the 5 easy steps for saying yes to yourself download that I could give you.

But I don’t.  All I have is the learning from my experiences which I will happily share with you here.

And a little bit of advice:
Practice saying yes to the small things, it helps to build you up for saying yes to the big stuff.

Who are you to say yes to yourself?  Who are you not to?

I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me, to make me less afraid, more accessible, to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch a promise.
I choose to risk my significance;
to live so that which came to me as a seed goes to the next as blossom and that which came to me as blossom goes on as fruit.
- Dawna Markova

Just say Yes.  Originally posted at www.freedomandfulfillment.net/blog

©2010 Cathy Wilke