Amanda Bynes channels Lucille Ball

Trending Now, Oh Lucy What Shall I Do?

 

Lucy, she says, what do I do now?

Johnny is lost at sea and the Black Pearl

Is in repair, flood damage from the last storm

I lost my job and died my hair, and now

I’ve retired and there isn’t a thing to do.

Ivanka didn’t recoil when Daddy Donald

And Mother dearest, Ivana, divorced, no

She continued marching on through the media muck

And now has launched a handbag and footwear line

Oh Lucy, what shall I do? The future looked

Grim once to Ameila Earnart too, but what did she

Do when they told her no, that’s not for a woman

Like you, instead she flew and flew and left

Her life and love, and all that she knew

Behind, and took flight that once last time.

Oh Lucy, whatever shall I do? Look at the Duchess of York

In debit to her teeth selling off secrets two by two

First, she dumps Andrew, sexy and true, maxs out her credit line

All while the Queen smiles and wave, she whispers to

Charlie, no more can she have, lock the doors and hide the silver.

Having nothing to do, she writes Dieting with the Duchess,

Books and movies too, now she’s negotiating with Oprah

Oh Lucy, I haven’t a clue

Since the Iphone app I wanted isn’t approved

I want it, I want it, I do, I do.

Lucy, a girl's gotta do what a girl has got to do,

Thelma told Louise, the open road is where

We need to be. Now I am thinking, Lucy

The Ford Explorer I drive isn’t me, it’s a

Manly-man wannabe car, not a soon to be

Unretired starlet like me car. Oh Lucy,

I know what to do. I’ll finish my degree

On line and star in a movie and dream of

Bill Compton, and hope Sookie is turned.