Ok, I'm done!

Sooooooo, lately I’ve been very “woe is me”, but I’m trying to stop. Yes, my life has been thru the craziest changes in the last 4 years, but I have come out swinging thru everything. I seriously don’t know why I dwell so much, I’m such a strong person and I know in the end that I will make it out alive no matter what.

I’m the biggest detractor in my life and I’d be lying to myself to allow my brain to think otherwise another minute longer. No one, not my friends, not my family, can stop me from doing what I want to do. Working thru my fears is one thing. Working thru NOTHING to get SOMETHING is another. It’s ridiculous. I wish someone would just slap me in the ass and put me back on the field. I know that’s a job for ME, but dammit, I DON’T WANNA DO IIIIIIIIITTTT..

How do people jump back into the saddle?? What’s the easiest route? Something tells me it’s my aversion to any kind of workload lately that is always hampering my dreams.

I dunno, just stab me in the eye w/ a spoon already.