Writer Series: Interview with Emily Giffin

Deborah Feingold

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Since there are so many incredible women writers on skirt.com, we are doing a summer series of interviews with successful female authors from all genres to inspire the skirt! nation to write their hearts out. We're hoping an insider's view of the writing process will help you in your own endeavors.

Emily Giffin is the NY Times Best Selling author of Baby Proof, Something Borrowed, Something Blue, Love the One You're With and The Heart of the Matter. She is lives in Atlanta, GA with her husband, her twin boys and her daughter.  We peppered her with questions about her writing process, getting her book published and handling rejection. Oy! Read her frank answers below:

How did you get your first book published? Did you write the whole thing and then sell it, sample chapters, etc?

"To be clear, the first book I wrote was never published.  I wrote it while practicing law (on the weekends and at night and sometimes when I should have been working!), found an agent and then received a slew of rejection letters. You can actually find the very rude response from my agent delivering that news posted on my website! I then moved to London and wrote my second novel—the first to be published—Something Borrowed. I finished the whole book, which took about fourteen months and then set about finding a new agent. To do so, I used a book called Jeff Herman’s Guide to Agents, following his advice to the letter. I had no friends in publishing—nor did I have any author friends—so I was really flying solo… That’s why I always tell unpublished authors that there is no real magic to the process. So don’t be intimidated—just have a thick skin and lots of resolve."

What made you want to be a writer instead of a lawyer?

"I always wanted to be a writer—from the time I was old enough to actually write. So the question really should be—why did I go to law school?  I’m not really sure looking back, but I think I had the sense that I had to get a “real” job first, that I couldn’t graduate and promptly sit down to write a novel. I took a lot of history and political science classes so law school became a logical next stop. If I’m completely honest, I also think I went to school because it felt safer—a more certain path to measurable success. I think it always feels riskier and scarier to go after something you really love and want because the rejection and failure hurts more."

What would you say have been your lucky breaks?

"Getting published involves a lot of luck; it is all so subjective and the editors making decisions have individual taste as with any reader. But luck is so important once that first book publishes too. Of course, everyone from my publicist to the marketing and art departments does their diligence around what will sell, but it’s very difficult to predict what will take off and exactly how word of mouth will work for a book. Sometimes I still can’t believe that this is all happening. I am so lucky and feel grateful every day."

How important is it to have a great editor?

"It is absolutely critical. I owe so much to my editor, Jennifer Enderlin, who I’ve been with since the beginning.  Beyond her deft editing of my stories, she is a fierce in-house advocate. If I were going to war, I’d want Jen by my side."

After you sold your first book, did you have any doubt about making it as a writer? Do you ever get writer’s block?

"Yes, I have doubts all the time. It never gets easier. And pretty much every day is filled with at least a few moments of frustration in which I’m staring at a blank screen. To me, writing is about overcoming those moments, fighting through them, getting to the other side. More than anything, I write for that feeling of accomplishment and relief. I remember my publicist once saying to me, about another writer, “She only had one book in her.” That is always my fear—that I’ve reached my limit. But I’ve discovered that nearly every author—no matter how accomplished—has this feeling on occasion. And ultimately, I believe that writing is mostly about hard work, perseverance, keeping faith in yourself—which, I believe, is true of most things in life worth pursuing."

With small kids, how do you find time to be such a prolific writer?

"The same way any working mother finds time to do her job. I get this question a lot, and it always puzzles me. I think there must be a perception that all writers do so on the side, as a hobby of sorts. But this is my career, my full-time job, and I have to treat it that way in order to make my deadlines and handle the business, marketing and publicity side of things. So generally, after I have breakfast with my children and see them off to school, I retreat to my attic office where I stay for most of the day. I’m lucky to also have a fabulous nanny/personal assistant and a husband who truly believes in co-parenting. "

Where do you get inspiration for your characters?

"My books are all relationship focused, so much of my inspiration comes from my own relationships and the issues and concerns that arise among my friends and family. It’s amazing how universal certain themes are, such as whether there are deal breakers when it comes to true love (Baby Proof); the idealization of a past relationship and a fixation on the “the one who got away” (Love the One You’re With); or complicated, if not downright toxic, female friendships (Something Borrowed). It is always so satisfying to write a book and discover how much it resonates with readers of all ages, worldwide."

What other career could you see yourself doing besides writing?

 "I would love to be a talk show host or a therapist. I love to analyze relationships—break emotions down."

What are some of your favorite resources for fellow writers?

"I was inspired by Stephen King’s On Writing. I also recommend Turning Life Into Fiction by Robin Hemley, Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott, and Self-editing for Fiction Writers by Renni Browne and Dave King."