12 Rules for My Unborn Daughter

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1. When on a dinner date, order the steak. 

2. Never make fun of your brother in front of other girls.

3. Let him take your coat. That’s the moment he’s been waiting for.

4. Don’t sleep with your bra on. So I’ve been told.

5. Yes, your skirt is too short.

6. Having an accent does not make him more sophisticated.

7. Learn to sew your own clothes. You’ll become a better shopper.

8. If you want to look older, try plastic surgery.

9. Keep a bottle of Champagne in the fridge and ice cream in the freezer.

10. Ride a bicycle.

11. You don’t need to do anything to prove you like him. Ever.

12. Dance with your father. And not just on your wedding day.

Walker Lamond is a writer, television producer and author of Rules for My Unborn Son (St. Martin’s Press), now available in bookstores. He lives in Washington, D.C. with his wife, son and newborn daughter.

Next month’s guest writer is Dara Chadwick,
author of You’d Be So Pretty If…