Sittin' and well, just sittin

I am taking a meditation class.  Me who always thought that meditation sounded about as fun as getting my fingernails pulled out one at a time.  The idea of trying to sit and be still made me want to flee!

But ironically I am loving it.  I went and experienced an entire weekend of sitting and focusing on my breath and boy if you want to really experience your mind running around like a frantic rabbit, go to a meditation retreat.

Things I hadn't thought about in years just insisted on coming to mind and coming and coming and coming.  The interesting and cool thing though is that the object is not to get the mind to stop thinking.  You can't.  So once I was relieved of the pressure of that, I actually started to enjoy it. Sort of.

Enjoy may not be quite the right word because honestly as soon as you start 'enjoying' it, you're probably off in a fantasy land of thinking again.  'Back to the breathe Annie!'  The idea is not to stop thinking or stop feeling but instead to continue to return to the breath by saying, "THINKING" any time you notice that you are thinking, which in the beginning is pretty damned often!

The thinking is incessant.  The answer is yes and so in the first few 'sits' it was pretty much just 'thinking, thinking, thinking....oh big thinking....and more thinking.'  But even with all that, I tried to relax and have fun with it all.  But not too much fun or that would have been more thinking!

You get the idea.

Well anyway it's a good challenge.  That is what I like about it.  The idea of training my mind to become more like a skilled horse than a frantic rabbit really appeals to me.  What I like more than that though is the philosophy behind it - that all of this leads to a kinder, more compassionate and enlightened society.  I'm all for that.

So for me it's worth the effort to feel my muscles ache and my mind run around crazy like a rabbit.  If I can contribute just one small bit but my little sit then it will be a perfect fit.  (I couldn't resist the rhyme!)

The true test of my perfectly stable mind was that the guy next to me, someone I've known for years, is actually very hunky and cute.  Hmm, let's add that to the mix of things to not focus on!

I want  you to know that I emerged intact - fixed my aching back and have continued to practice once or twice a week since.  I'm making a small goal for myself since I know how easily that not-yet-enlightened horse can bolt.

Today wherever you are, take a moment to experience the power of sittin' and well just sittin'.  Doing nothing is a very good thing.

Yours in always sharing the challenges to creating an enlightened life,

Annie