"Ugh, Men!" And the Women Who Love Them

My very intuitive friend posed the question the other day, "Why do MEN get the free pass to be idiots?" She added, "Why is stupid behavior justified with, "Men!" and a roll of the eyes?" It got me thinking.

Ladies of the world, I've got something to say: We let men get away with too much based upon the theory that, "Boys will be boys." I say, enough is enough!

I've heard countless horror stories about how men are going to strip clubs after the women in their lives have asked them not to, treating their wives/girlfriends less like the goddesses they are and a lot more like doormats. But what affronts my senses even more is the advice that they are getting from their GIRLfriends.

"It's his friends. He's not like that when it's just the two of you."

"What do you expect? He's a guy!"

Wanna know what I say? STOP MAKING EXCUSES FOR HIM.

I may be in a biased position here because I have a near-perfect boyfriend. But he does make mistakes like forgetting birthdays and generally not listening to me when we're apart. I understand that the easiest thing to do is to say, "Well, he's a guy." But, I'm done with excuses. I love to call him out when he's not listening to me because it makes him listen MORE the next conversation we have. I'm never going to say, "I understand you don't listen to me because that's just what you do" again. 

Instead of enabling them to keep screwing up, punish them! No, I am not suggesting breaking up or cutting off contact but you need to stand up for YOURSELF and tell them how you feel.

I know I have had friends tell me, "He's a guy? What do you expect?" and for years I accepted this because it meant that if it was genetic, it wasn't me. But it is, at least partially, my fault.

So what DO I expect when my boyfriend messes up? The same thing he expects from me. Honesty, apologies and a lot of make-up kisses. Oh, and a promise that we've both learned from the situation and will grow from it.

Once you do this, your relationship will grow so much deeper because you won't be creating a glass ceiling for him. We are setting them up to fail by accepting that they can't improve. This, is nonsense.

Once he learns that you don't tolerate him talking to other women, not helping with the cooking or cleaning, not walking the dog or cleaning out the litter box he will become the man you've always wanted. Because he knows he can't give you the excuse, "Hey, babe, I'm a dude. What do you want from me?'

And if he ever asks you that question, lovely goddesses, you tell him exactly what you want.